STOP PANICKING, START BREATHING AND FOCUS
By stopping panicking and starting breathing, you can focus on some coping skills that are going to help you become stronger than ever.
ARE YOU OUT OF CONTROL?
There are many people who find themselves out of control at different points. You may find you are not sleeping, you are worried about paying your bills, you are concerned about relationships, you are worried about getting a new job—who knows?—but there are various areas where we all need to improve coping skills and today I just want to work on a few different ideas that can really boost you along the journey.
Point No. 1: The first point is to really be specific and list where are you not coping, that point when you say, “I can’t cope.”
What is it that is triggering you? Is it children? Is it a work situation? Is it a business situation?
Try to actually list it out and write it down. It is really important to see what it is because you are most likely going to find that it is just one specific area where you cannot cope and need some more support on and that it is not everything! In the moment of panic we bring everything together. You may get a headache or stomach ache or however you experience it,everything becomes overwhelming. So, if you can – really separate what is the specific problem area, where do you need more help?
WHAT SUPPORT IS AVAILABLE RIGHT NOW?
Point No. 2: Consider what support is currently available to you that you are not using. This might be pretty simple. For example, maybe you need some space to work to create your business but you have childcare issues. Think! Have you any friends who can help? Have you parents who can help? Is there any local community, is there any help you can get nearby?
Or are you finding it difficult to cope in another aspect of your business? You need some more administrative help. Let us say for example you have too much paperwork to get through or you need some data collected, something researched or something typed. Think again for a second! Where are you not best using your skills? Is there anything you can outsource? If you have a spare $100 or £100 sitting around, maybe you can hire an outsourcer. Use a website like oDesk.com or Elance.com where you can hire an outsourcer for anything from—well, you pretty much pick the price and say what you are looking for. Again, think what is available to you? Which resources are available to you?
Point No. 3: In terms of strengthening and sharpening your coping skills, where can you be stronger? Where do you have more internal strength that you are not currently using? A friend of mine always uses an example which I really like. When I would say at various times a few years ago when I was really struggling., “Oh, what do I do about my business now? What do I do now?”
He gave me an analogy and said “If you are walking through the forest in middle of winter, and see a baby who is lying on the floor, crying and shivering, do you say I need to get a book and ask advice on how to feed this baby, how to clothe it, or how to get the baby warm? Do you start mentally thinking through different things and go and try speak to friends? No! You just feed that baby. You do whatever it takes and you find that strength within.”
There are stories of mothers who, if the car has fallen on their child, they will just literally reach underneath, pick this car up, with superhuman strength.You have got more strength within which you are not currently using. As human beings, we do not use majority of our brain capacity. We do not use our physical potential. So the question is where do you have more strength within and where can you use it?
WHAT CAN YOU DO NEXT?
Point No. 4: The fourth question I would ask you today is s in terms of coping skills and ask you to focus on what you can do next. What is the next action? I remember for years I had been worried about things 12 months in advance, 18 months in advance, things which were somewhere in the future and pretty much never came to fruition because they did not exist! They were just worries. They were made up. They were false expectations appearing real, one of the acronyms for fear: False Expectations Appearing Real. They were just fears.
So the question is “What is your next action?” Do not worry about running a marathon or walking a thousand miles. Just focus on the next step. That is going to help you cope. to help you be stronger and get closer towards your positive destiny, towards fulfilling your potential.
That concludes today’s advice! If you would like some more ideas on coping I have other incredible training materials and resources for you on my website, http://MarcusJFreed.com.
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