Today we are talking about seduction techniques and applying them to your business. I will explain. There is a book, which has been looked up to by many single men over the last few years. it has been looked down on by many single women for other reasons! it is called The Game by Neil Strauss. and is all about seduction techniques. In The Game there is some really interesting information that can apply directly to our business life, so I wanted to share a couple of these ideas with you.
MAKING THE APPROACH
First of all, what he really does is to describe the kind of guy who is completely unappealing and unattractive. They, basically, wander into a bar. They have no-one around them and are not talking to anyone. They seem very, very available. When they go up to a woman, they use the same old lines and do not get far. These are basically all actions to be avoided but we can break them down into four nice and easy points.
Point No. 1: We need to establish social proof to to win more clients. There are various ways of doing this. One way is literally get your “Likes” on Facebook, YouTube or the Comments below, but there are also other ways. You can actually obtain other proof that you really are liked as a business, as a person and as a provider. One is to display testimonials on your site, but you can also do this through press cuttings, online clippings, other videos and other materials. Think about the other ways of actually proving you are worthwhile and attractive to a potential customer.
Point No. 2, Create some sense of exclusivity. If you are completely available and the potential client asks when you are free if you say “oh anytime, whenever you want, I’m here.” or if you are asked “How many customers can you take on?” and you reply “I can take on any customers and willing to do anything at any price” these are not appealing or attractive responses.
I am not talking about this in terms of being sexually attractive because that is not why a customer is coming to you – unless you happen to be in the sex industry! However, I am not making coaching videos for that industry. So what am I talking about? The answer is to make sure you appear to be somewhat exclusive.
For example, if you’re a coach, you might say “Well I’ve only got five slots left in my practice, five available places for clients.” Or if you are a plumber you might say “Well, we’re pretty busy at the moment; but I can offer you this or that time this week.. Otherwise, it will have to wait till another week.” Even if you are not completely busy, give the impression that you are in demand.
One thing I recall from Neil Strauss’s book The Game was an example of meeting someone at the bar. You say to them, “I can only stay for a minute as I have to get back to my friends” and maybe after minutes pass you might say, “Oh, they can wait another minute, but I really must go very soon” and then you leave. Again, you are giving the impression that you are are important, someone who is liked by others and are needed elsewhere. This applies to whether you are in a bar, in business or whatever else you may be doing.
Point No. 3, Do not appear needy. It is not cool. I know that because I have spent many parts of my life being uncool and needy! Needy is not attractive – so do not be needy.
DON’T BE NEEDY
How can you get around not being needy? Well, you can apply all of the above points, but it is really Point No. 4 which is going to help you avoid appearing needy and change your image.
Point No. 4: The most important action, above everything else, is be interested in the other person. To be genuinely interested in the other person. Why? Because people like to feel cared about. They like to be listened to. They like to be validated as human beings.
Forget the whole pick up, seduction routine. This is just naturally seductive as opposed to being manipulatively seductive. As human beings, as souls, we want to be seen. We want to be heard. If you think of the last time someone looked deeply into your eyes in a way that was safe, in a way that was comfortable, created the space for you and really took a stand for you just to be there to support you, it probably felt pretty amazing.
We like people who treat us like that. It is hardwired into our spiritual DNA. We like other souls who create the space for us and it is incredibly seductive.
ATTRACT MORE PEOPLE
So if you are looking to bring new people into your sphere, if you want to be able to serve more people, if you want to increase your cash flow, increase profitability, increase all of that stuff, be interested in your potential clients. Be interested in everyone, but be particularly interested in the people whom you want to contribute towards, whom your company or business can serve. That is what will make the difference.
That concludes today’s advice! If you have any questions or comments, please join the conversation and comment below.
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Be well and see you soon.